


Follow the Tracks

by DoomKitteh



Series: Seirixori Has Feelings [9]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Dungeons & Dragons - All Media Types, Queertical Role
Genre: F/F, I added their last names! I don't know why lol, Train AU! that then got kind of mixed with an animal santuary type thing...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-09 18:38:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15273792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoomKitteh/pseuds/DoomKitteh
Summary: You get knocked around on the crowded train and find yourself in the arms of an angel.Not really, but you certainly can't get her out of your mind.





	1. Chapter 1

You're minding your own business, standing on a full train, waiting for it to leave it’s current stop. You’re exhausted from the day’s work, nearly spending twelve hours at an abandoned house trying to gather what felt like  _ hundreds _ of cats. It’s not even the workout that has you so tired. The emotional rollercoaster you’ve been on all day has drained you.

 

Stepping into that house and the overwhelming smell and then the sight… dozens of cats in varying degrees of health. You were the only one who could even stomach the dead ones. Which isn’t saying much because once you were all finished and everyone was back at the station, you stayed in the shower for an extra twenty minutes puking and then dry heaving and sobbing while the wall barely held you up.

 

It’s days like these that you wonder how you continue to do this. It’s also times like this that you’re glad they moved you into only doing cases where the owner’s were nowhere to be found because you might have had one or two— several— instances where you miiiight have roughed up a neglectful owner. 

 

All you wanted was to fall asleep on your rather long train ride out of town and towards your home. Instead you’re stuck standing, catching yourself every now and then nodding off and your grip loosening on the strap above. 

 

Of course it’s also the day that some asshole has decided he’s going to barge his way into your space to give himself more room, it shouldn’t be a surprise, being a tiefling generally means most people are going to either ignore you or go out of their way to cause you some kind of mundane problem. It still catches you off guard and you’ve never been very graceful, but today is terrible and this idiot is adding to it, your hand easily slips out of the strap and you go careening towards the floor. Your limbs too sluggish to react fast enough and you just close your eyes, waiting to slam onto the floor with no resistance.

 

Your body does slam into something, but it’s too soft and warm to be the ground.

 

“Are y’alright?” 

 

You open your eyes, blinking against the bright light, and you find yourself staring into a pair of worried green eyes. Your breath catches in your throat once more and you’re mesmerized by this woman.

 

Her hand comes up to your cheek and you blink again, a rushing sound fills your ears and the noise of the train car returns, you hadn’t even noticed it was missing.

 

“Hi.” You say, and later when you’re slumped over on your couch, Stool animatedly chattering next to you, you’ll curse yourself for how stupid this was.

 

“Hello,” She smiles with a raised eyebrow, “As much as I love havin’ a woman in my arms, I don’t see how this is dreadfully comfortable for ya.”

 

Now that’s she said something, your limbs are at an awkward angle and you feel the ache in your back. You’re incredibly low to the ground, if your arm wasn’t clutching to her shirt you’re sure it’d be touching the floor. “Oh… s— sorry. I… sorry.” you squeak out and try to scramble your way out of her arms but it doesn’t really work because you can’t get your footing and you’re silently cursing to yourself because you know you’re being an absolute fool right now.

 

“Hey, no need t’rush,” the woman gives you a squeeze because her arm is still around your waist, having failed to really move, and you lose your breath again, “It’s not everyday I manage t’have someone as pretty as you in my arms. I think part of you doesn’t mind it.” She glances down and you see your tail wrapped around her waist.

 

It won’t be until later that you notice that her face is just as red as yours. You sputter and she gently helps you to stand again and it’s now that you notice how short she is. “Goddess…” you whisper and her raised eyebrow and grin have you sputtering again because you weren’t directly calling her one but you kind of were and you just sort of… sit on the floor to be more at eye-level with her.

 

“Th— thank you.” You finally manage.

 

“‘Course darlin’.” She winks and you swear you should have passed out by now from all the blood continuously rushing to your face, “Can’t have you breakin’ those pretty horns anymore than they already are.”

 

You start to reach up to your own horns, your first thought being  _ these _ horns? Your mother was the only one who ever told you how much she liked them and it took you a very long time after she disappeared to like them yourself. She smiles and nods, like she knows what you’re thinking. Then she steps into your space and you catch yourself leaning in.

 

“Let’s getchya onto a seat, darlin’. It might not be any cleaner but it should be safer.” She helps you up and now that you’re finally on your feet again you notice that she’s more than a foot shorter than you and you’re amazed again because she is also  _ really _ strong.

 

It’s then you notice that you’ve passed at least three stops and the car isn’t as full as it was before. She leads you to a pair of seats and lets you take the window while she sits beside you. She starts chatting with you and you know you’ve answered several of her questions, but her hand is still holding yours and it’s warm and you’re so tired and you try so hard to stay awake but the day catches up with you and the next thing you know you’re body is jerking forward and you feel yourself go flying. You smack your head into the seats in front of you and when you look around you realize you’re at the last stop, your stop. 

 

“ _ Fuck!”  _ You curse because that fucking hurt but it also means the woman from earlier is gone and you fell asleep while she was talking and could you be anymore of a complete mess? You reach up to touch your forehead and when you look at your hand you see the blood there… and a piece of paper.

 

You open it quickly and there’s a name and a number...that you can’t read because the blood you touched smeared part of it and you’re barely able to stop yourself from crying.

 

You’re too tired for this shit and you’re going to pretend you didn’t just definitely meet the woman of your dreams… who was also  _ in _ your dreams for all of the five minutes you knew her.

 

When you get home you drop everything next to the door and groan as you flop onto the couch, ignoring the disgruntled noises from Stool.

 

“Rough day?” Misha walks in from the kitchen, snacking on something, probably ice cream. 

 

You grunt because you’re really not in the mood to discuss it. You two have a weird relationship and bringing up anyone that you might like is just awkward, more for you than her. You dated for all of two seconds, really. One of her mother’s really wanted to kill you, before, during, and after, even more so when she eventually found out the two of you ended up living together. Misha’s dated quite a few people and she’ll bring it up every now and then and you’re really happy for her, but you’re always afraid her mother is going to come around the corner and murder you if you even mention another person. You’re always glad for how demisexual you are because it’s very rare that you end up even liking anyone. 

 

This thought has you groaning again because now you’re actively thinking about the woman on the train and you start whining about it, now not caring who you’re complaining to. “Today was terrible there were so many cats and they were so sad and some of them weren’t alive and I didn’t get to leave until six and then I started falling asleep standing up on the train and some asshole ran into me and instead of crashing onto the floor this— this dwarf woman caught me and I…” you trail off, finally breathing and Misha moves to sit on the coffee table, staring at you wide-eyed and eating her ice cream in rampant fascination. “She was so pretty and strong and— and ugh I don’t even know her name because I fucking fell asleep while she was talking to me and then!” You whip out your arm, the piece of paper still clutched in your hand and you show it to Misha who shoves her spoon in her mouth and grabs it, “I hit my head and the blood smeared her name and number!  And I’ll never see her again and I hate everything.”

 

“You’ve been spending too much time with Ryleigh, you’re being extra dramatic,” Misha says around the spoon. 

 

“She does live with us,” you mumble into the couch, waving your hand like you’re trying to slap her but it’s haphazard and she just laughs at you. You turn onto your back and frown as you stare at the ceiling. “I don’t like this feeling.”

 

“Which feeling is that exactly?” Misha asks, moving from the coffee table to the couch, forcing you to sit up and she rests her head in your lap. You let out a tired laugh when Stool chatters at her, upset that she made them move. They curl around your neck and you let out a relaxing breath. It wasn’t too long ago that you never would have felt this comfortable with anyone but you’re glad for the friends you made and you don’t really want to think about where your life would be had you never met them.

 

“Like there’s this gaping hole and it’s hard to breath. Is this normal? It usually takes me  _ months _ to like someone romantically and I fall into her arms, literally, and I’m… I feel so… lost because she isn’t here.”

 

“If Mama didn’t hate you, I’d tell you to go talk to Mother.” 

 

You snort, Cae would absolutely murder you on the spot. Eloise at least likes you… a little bit… you think. 

 

Misha sighs and turns to her side, setting the ice cream onto the table before turning back and taking one of your hands. The funny thing is you two were never this touchy feely when you dated. It’s weird to you now even just thinking about it. It hurt then, it hurt a hell of a lot, but you were both teenagers and she somehow got caught up in all your drama and was front and center when your family was murdered and depression took over your soul. You both put each other through a lot of bullshit and sometimes you can’t believe she’s still your friend.

 

It’s then you hear Ryleigh come in and you know Rukiya is with her. She always is and you wonder how long it’ll be before Rukiya moves in or Ryleigh moves out. You really hope Rukiya moves in. You also know that the three of you would have to move closer to the city for that to really be an option. Something  _ you _ won’t do because you live on an a couple acres of land that you own by default and you can’t see yourself giving it up. It’s the only thing left you have of your mother’s.

 

Ryleigh spots both of you pretty quickly and she drops Rukiya’s hand and stalks over to you. Misha is already half way to sitting by the time Ryleigh gets there and she pushes you over just enough so she’s comfortably nestled into your side. Misha takes the same position on your other side and you try to stop it you really do, but the tears come anyway.

 

“Bad day?” Rukiya whispers, setting a cup of hot tea in front of you. You didn’t even know she went to get it.

 

“Yeah, something like that.” You say, grateful for the tea but you’re basking in the warm presence of your friends and it helps to dull this weird ache you have. “How do you guys… how…” You try to ask them about this thing with the stranger but you know Ryleigh is kind of like you and it took her forever to realize Rukiya meant more to her than just a friend. Misha’s never been in a serious relationship...Rukiya… well maybe she’ll know but you still think this is insane.

 

You go into further detail about your work day, figuring that’s an easier place to start, but it kind of ends up with all of you teary eyed and you make an off-handed comment about wishing you could turn this place into a rescue or something so that you know for sure what happens to all the animals you take from neglectful owners.

 

“You should.” Ryleigh says to you and the other two agree and you nod, you’ll think about it later because... because you really need help processing these foreign feelings.

 

You then stumble through what happened on the train today. How when you opened your eyes the prettiest of green met yours and how strange it was that if felt like the world had stopped. You explain how it took you a few moments to register sound and how even your tail reacted to her so quickly. 

 

“And then I fell asleep.” You sigh and cover your face with your hands. You’ve been beating yourself up over falling asleep this entire time and it just keeps weighing down on you and you just want it to  _ stop _ because you know it’s ridiculous but you can’t help it.

 

Rukiya scoots forward on the table so that her knees hit yours and she takes one of your hands, lifts it, and places a light kiss on your knuckles before threading your fingers together. You know your face is a little red and you know Ryleigh is going to tease you about it later. Rukiya’s the only one who has ever been able to make you flustered and she relishes in doing it. “You’ll see her again, Seirixori.”

 

“How do you know?” You ask, nearly pleading. 

 

She stands and gives you a kiss on the forehead, “Because if you’re this star struck with her, I know she’s at least feeling a fraction of what you are and will show up on that train again. Have a little faith,  _ homashoc _ .” You smile when she uses Ryleigh’s Infernal term of endearment for you.

 

***

 

You stopped having faith two weeks into it. You still feel this kind of… emptiness but you ignore it because what else are you going to do? 

 

It helps that work has been more hectic than usual and you are currently covered in so much animal hair and bodily fluids that the only thing on your mind right now is about twenty showers.

 

“Ugh I think I can taste it…” You mutter to yourself as you try to breath in through your mouth. You can’t really decide if tasting it or smelling it is worse so you just do both. You even try to just keep your arms away from your body despite the fact that every inch is covered in  _ something _ . 

 

“Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.” 

 

You inhale sharply at the voice, and of course choke on it because the smell really is that horrible. When you finally manage to get your cough under control, backing away from her the entire time when she quickly tries to help you, you stare into those eyes again and lose yourself once more. “Y— you’re here. H— how?”

 

She blushes and looks to her feet briefly and you melt as you watch her suddenly become really confident and you have to focus quickly because she’s talking and you don’t want to miss anything this time. “You were wearin’ your work shirt and you talked about it for a bit until you passed out.” She bites her lip and again, you start getting distracted. These feelings you have are usually a gradual sort of thing, but with this woman they just go from 0 to 100 in less than a second. “This seems a little stalkery, really, because I did give you my number an’ I was…” Her accent started off pretty thick but it seems she’s actively trying to ramp it down when she notices. You can’t help the stupid grin on your face and you don’t notice her pause— you’re too busy looking into those eyes.

 

“ _ Gunny _ quit starin' an' jus' ask 'er out, yer bein’ all googly eyed an’ shit!” You hear a thick scottish accent and when you look up there’s a green half-orc and a red tiefling, both in workout clothes, and both very much showing off their muscles several feet away.

 

“ _ Gunnloda _ !” You whisper excitedly because the only part of the name you could read was ‘loda’ and with her friend’s nickname you quickly put it together. You watch her turn bright red and flip off her friends without looking.

 

“Yes, darlin’?” Her accent is back in full force and it takes you a brief second to realize she heard you.

 

“Y-your name! I didn’t, it was— Um—” You’re a bumbling mess and you shouldn’t be surprised, getting older did nothing for how nervous you get talking to some people. Before you can say any more there’s a commotion behind you and you watch as Findarris, a wolf trying to pass as a husky, comes flying around the corner, covered in mud, and he’s headed straight for you. “Oh fu—” is all you manage before he jumps onto you and knocks you onto your back. You groan in pain from being knocked on your ass but also from his weight. “Get off you big oaf!” You try pushing him off but he wants to play and his paws push into your diaphragm causing you to lose your breath. 

 

“C’mere big guy.” You hear her say and Findarris actually lunges off of you and onto her, but she’s apparently sturdy as fuck because he’s taller than she is whether he’s sitting or standing and she’s laughing as he stands and places his front paws on her shoulders licking her face. “Big kid aren’t ya?” He woofs and you hear a familiar whistle and he’s sitting immediately and wagging his tail.

 

“Mother fucker…” You gasp out. Gunnloda helps you into a sitting position and you’re caught staring again, both of you absolutely filthy from Findarris (and you’re still nasty as hell from before), but she doesn’t seem to mind. She reaches forward and wipes some mud off your face and you can’t help but inhale sharply as she does so, holding it in until her hand pulls away.

 

“Y’alright darlin’?”

 

You nod vigorously, your words having left you, never to return with the smile she gives you.

 

“I apologize, Seirixori. Takara told him you were back.” You look up and Mielikki, your adoptive mother (sort of? It’s really convoluted), stands looking as pristine as ever. She looks to Gunnloda and she tilts her head and you swear there’s a sort of recognition in her eyes. “Hello.”

 

“Hello, ma’am.” Gunnloda replies and starts to help you to your feet, giving Findarris one last pat on the head. 

 

The two leave and you start trying to explain yourself, “I’m sorry I fell asleep! I really wanted to continue talking to you but I— it had been a really long really bad day and and then I woke up and I sort of hit my head on the seats and wiped off the blood but I didn’t know you left your name and number in my hand and the blood smeared it all and I’ve been thinking about you since then, can’t stop really and I have said far too much and I am never going to open my mouth again.” You let out a whine in the back of your throat, You haven’t been this nervous in so long that you thought you’d gotten over your penchant to ramble and over-share. Guess not.

 

“Well that’d be a real shame if I never got to hear that pretty voice again.”

 

You blush and there’s cheering coming from her friends, which causes her face to also turn red. “Your friends are um…”

 

“Obnoxious?”

 

You laugh, “Nosy.” You scrunch your nose and smile.

 

She laughs with you and nods, “Very… I suppose in this case, however, I don’t mind it.” She moves to step forward but she hesitates and you know she can now smell the  _ wonderful _ odor you emit. “They talked me into stopping by, they’re very convincing during a workout.”

 

You’re about to respond, but Takara pops her head out, “Seirixori, get your dirty ass in here and finish up!”  

 

“Right… yes, sorry, I uh… will you, um will you stay? I’m— I need like fifty showers but then I’m free for… uh, whatever.” You manage to get out, shuffling nervously.

 

“Dinner. I know of a decent place.”

 

“Decent? You’re being humble again, Gunnloda!” The tiefling yells out, getting elbowed in the side by the half-orc.

 

“Really nosy,” she says with a smile.

 

“I would love to have you for dinner— to have dinner with you! Oh my fucking… why do I ever open my mouth???”

 

“Both can be arranged,” She winks and you’re too embarrassed to hear her friends cheer her on, “Go get yourself clean, darlin’ and I’ll treat you t’some of the best food you’ve ever had.”

 

You don’t reply, just turn quickly, nearly throwing yourself off balance and head back inside.

 

“She’s cute,” Takara comments as she wrestles with a now clean, but very wet, Findarris when you make your way inside.

 

You nod, not trusting your words. After about thirty minutes in the shower you feel clean enough, but you’ve had enough time to make yourself a huge ball of nerves and you fumble for your phone.

 

“Seirixori?”

 

“Ryleigh! Ryleigh, she’s here, like  _ here, here _ . At my work and she asked me to dinner and I opened my mouth and said really dumb things but she didn’t seem to mind, and her friends are here. I have no idea what I’m doing and I was covered in animal excrement the entire time. Please help me, I don’t know what I’m doing.” There’s silence on the other end and you pull the phone away to look at it, making sure you’re still connected, then you hear the laughing on the other end. “It isn’t funny,” you whine.

 

“Gods, it’s like when you were fifteen all over again.” Ryleigh laughs for a little longer before finally talking to you, “Listen, if it’s a public thing, send me the address and Rukiya and I will be there. I promise you’ll be alone, but we can at least make sure she’s good for you.” She can hear you groan, “You know I’ll keep calling you until you let me know.”

 

“Yeah, yeah.” You smile and you know she can’t see it, which is good because she really doesn’t need to know that you don’t really mind how protective she gets. “I’ll let you know soon…” you trail off as you step out of the locker room and then rush back in, “I’m an idiot, I should not be allowed out into society, please lock me away in our basement.”

 

“... Misha’s right. You have been spending too much time with me. What just happened?”

 

“I forgot… I forgot where I was… I called you as soon as I got out of the shower and I just…”

 

“Seirixori please tell me you did not just walk out naked…”

 

“I forgot!”

 

“Gods you are so helpless. Listen, I’m sure it’s fine, you’ve done it before, and you don’t normally care.”

 

“Yeah, but— but she was there and I don’t think  _ she _ saw but her friends sure did.”

 

“ _ Homashoc _ , take a deep breath okay. It’s going to be fine, now put some clothes on and go find out where we need to go to spy on you.”

 

You close your eyes and do as Ryleigh says. You hangs up and make your way out, ignoring the smirk on the tiefling’s face and the curious look the half-orc gives you.

 

“H— hi, sorry I was um… Hi.”

 

Gunnloda smiles and you find yourself taking a step closer. “Did you want to ride with us, or do you want to meet us there?” She asks and it takes you a moment to catch your brain up with her words.

 

“Uh—” you look around as if the walls have an answer and Takara and Mielikki catch your eye and they’re both standing nearby, not bothering to hide that they are eavesdropping. 

 

“She’ll meet you there,” Takara answers for you and she winks at your confusion, “I need a ride to a client’s house, it won’t take but a few minutes out of her way, I’m sure.”

 

Gunnloda and her two friends head out after giving you the address (and you relay it to Ryleigh). When you turn you see Mielikki closing up for the evening. “It’s only four, why are you— oh no.”

 

Takara laughs, “Come on, sweetheart, we won’t stay we just want to see where this girl is taking you.”

 

“Can’t you just, I don’t know, look it up on the internet?”

 

“Where’s the fun in that?”

 

“Ryleigh was right, it is like I’m fifteen again.”

 

“Well, if one of her parents wants your head on a wall, then you’re definitely still fifteen.” Takara continues poking fun at you all the way to the car. You try to take the keys from her but she pushes you into the backseat and you’re surprised when Mielikki gets into the back with you.

 

She doesn’t say anything and you shrug and stare out the window as Takara drives the three of you into a more populated part of the city. You’ve been fidgeting with your tail the entire time and you nearly jump when Mielikki takes your hand in hers and places her other hand on top, “You’ll be fine, dear. There’s nothing to worry about.”

 

“If you say so,” you say quietly glancing over quickly before turning back to the scenery going by.

 

Mielikki shifts and you finally turn to look at her and she’s giving you that weird smile. The one where it looks condescending but you’ve known her for so long now that you know that it isn’t and it warms your heart and you squeeze her hand. “You know I’m never wrong,” she says and taps your nose with her finger.

 

“I know, Ma,” you whisper and the smile becomes less forced and you can feel yourself relax as she starts talking about really weird details about a case that you really shouldn’t know anything about.

 

Takara pouts when you get out of the car, “Did you have to call her Ma? She’s going to be insufferable for a week.”

 

You grin cheekily and barely stop yourself from sticking out your tongue.You swear you’re almost thirty. “I know you were telling stories when I went to wash up. Paybacks,  _ Oaauao (auntie). _ ”

 

Takara grins, “Can’t get much by you anymore.” You give her a hug and she kisses your temple. “Now go and make more of a fool of yourself, she seems to like that.”

 

You groan as you walk to the front of a restaurant that Mielikki is standing in front of and looking over with a strange look. “Is everything okay, Ma?” You ask as you step beside her.

 

She turns to you after a moment and nods, “Of course, dearest, it just seems a bit familiar is all. Call us if you need a ride home.” She gives you an awkward shoulder pat and gets back into the car and you watch as they drive off.

 

“Oh man, even your moms came.” You hear Misha’s voice and you groan as you hang your head.

 

“Why are you  _ all _ here? Don’t you have better things to do than watch me make a fool of myself?”

 

“No.” They all answer at once. Rukiya heads over to see about getting a reservation and Misha is looking at the front much the same as Mielikki was.

 

“Is there something I should know about this place?” You ask her.

 

“I think I’ve been here before, that’s all.  Oh, let’s go!” She grabs Ryleigh and waves to you as they’re led inside, “We’ll be around if you need us!”

 

You turn to head inside when the half-orc from earlier stops you, “Hey kid.”

 

You cringe inwardly and turn to face her, “Uh… hey?”

 

“Name's Urrak, Bri'll be seatin' ye. Gunny's got somethin' special cookin' so she'll join ye in a bit.”

 

“Okay…” You say, confused, but also a little greatful that she’s telling you this.

 

“Yer a weird one, but she likes ye so whatever.” She steps in closer and you’re glad for your years at your job because you manage to stop yourself from taking a step back as she towers over you, “We’ll be watchin’.” And she leaves.

 

“Great, great, it’s fine. Everything is fi—” You walk right into someone and you groan because of course you did, but also because whomever you ran into is all muscle and it  _ hurts _ .

 

“I gotta say, I think Gunny downplayed your beauty but your cute clumsiness is spot on.”

 

The red in your cheeks lessens the deadpan stare you give the woman you ran into. It’s the red tiefling from before and while Gunnloda’s flirting is… extremely welcome and kind of cute… this is— you  _ hate _ it. “Are you … Bri?” You say in lieu of an answer because you’re sure digging into one of Gunnloda’s friends about unwelcomed attention isn’t exactly something you bring on a first date.

 

Oh, oh fuck.

 

This is a date.

 

A  _ date _ .

 

Clearly you’ve been out of sorts because the word  _ date _ never crossed your mind. You knew that’s what it was, of course that’s what this is… but your friends— your family — they distracted you enough that… you look down suddenly at your clothes and start panicking. Especially now that you recall your friends were dressed casually but it was  _ nice _ casual and you’re standing here in some loose cargo pants that you stole from a coworker who laughed at you for how dirty you were and a rather… holey tank top that you should have probably thrown away a year ago.

 

You’re going on your first date in  _ years _ and you’re dressed like you’ve been living in the same clothes for months.

 

The tiefling seems to notice you panic and she gets a good grip on your shoulder and for once you welcome a stranger’s touch, as it grounds you and pulls you out of your mental spiral. “It’s Brimeia. You okay there? Do I need to call Gunny over here so you can faint in her arms? I mean, I’ve got some pretty good ones,” she flexes and you try not to smile but the corner of your lip turns up just a little and her gold eyes and white teeth glint with success.

 

“Sorry, I uh… you’re all— I’m just…” you look down at your clothes and then back up and it looks like she changed at some point before you arrived and you stare helplessly because you just look… bad.

 

Brimeia chuckles and slaps you on the back and you stumble forward from the strength behind it, “Ah, don’t worry about that. Urrak and I got a glimpse of what was underneath,” she winks and you roll your eyes, “Gunnloda prefers the relaxed look anyway. She doesn’t believe in nice clothes when digging into something so…” Brimeia smirks and raises an eyebrow and you know she’s about to make the worst kind of innuendo so you stop her before she does.

 

“Great, okay, thanks, you’re a terrible person please just do whatever it is you’re supposed to so I can continue fucking up.” 

 

Brimeia frowns and she leans over so that she’s eye level with you and you’re a bit taken back by it but you don’t step away, “You haven’t fucked up anything, she finds it ‘rather endearing’.” The way Brimeia says it makes you think she’s mimicking Gunnloda, “I have not seen her this excited in a while. Chin up, Pinky.” She finishes with a bow and tips up your chin a little and you slap her hands away as she laughs and leads you inside.  

 

You were expecting something fancy and stiff, but when you look around it’s a weird sensation because it  _ is _ fancy in a sense that it just looks so clean and nice, but it’s warm and comfortable and you find yourself relaxing just a little bit. Taking a glance around you don’t see your friends and you can’t decide if that’s a good thing or not.

 

Brimeia pulls out your chair for you with another flourishing bow and you have to stop yourself from ignoring her and taking the other chair. You do, however, make it a point to make sure she sees you rolling your eyes as you take the offered seat. 

 

“She told me to keep you company but I have the strangest feeling you might kill me,” She grins and leaves with a wave, “Gunny will be out in a few minutes. Have fun!”

 

You look around and start nervously pinching and rubbing your tail. It’s a habit you don’t do often anymore, but you’re alone in a restaurant you’ve never been to before about to have dinner with… well with someone you don’t even know and now you’re starting to feel the beginning of a mild panic attack but a loud crash draws your attention.

 

You see Gunnloda over by the kitchen doors apologizing profusely, you assume, to the wait staff who has seven drinks worth of liquid on their clothes and broken glass on the ground. She starts to help but you watch as Brimeia and Urrak shoo her away and help clean up instead.

 

Her face is red as she reaches you and you can’t stop the smile from appearing, “Is my clumsiness that contagious?”

 

She laughs as she sits down, “Lucky for you, and me, I was surprisingly sturdy that day on the train. That,” she points to the mess still being cleaned up, “is unfortunately not surprising.”

 

You two are quiet for a few moments, and you’re glad you aren’t the only one who seems a bit nervous.

 

“Hello, darlin’,” she finally says with a soft smile.

 

“Hi,” you reply, putting you elbow on the table and resting your chin in your hand. “So, do you work here?”

 

You can’t decipher the look she gives you, “... I suppose you could say that, yes.”

 

“Oh, that’s neat, my friends are here.” You say quickly. Her response to your question made the nerves come back and you can’t stop yourself from rambling, “My friends and my ex, I mean we dated like fifteen years ago it isn’t an issue. She’s my roommate actually. Her mom still wants to kill me, though. I don’t know why I called her my ex, it’s been so long that I forget sometimes. Also, I’m pretty sure my family didn’t actually leave when they dropped me off, so I’m betting they’re here too. I’m going to stop talking now because I’ve said too much and uh… yeah.”

 

She stands up and your heart skips a beat briefly because you’re afraid she’s actually going to leave, but all she does is pull her chair closer to you instead of being on the opposite side of the table. She reaches out and gently pries your hand off your tail, you hadn’t even realized you were still holding it, and threads her fingers through yours. 

 

“You’re too adorable.”

 

“Thanks?” You know your face is red, something you think is going to be permanent when around her.

 

She’s about to ask you something, but the waiter brings out two glasses of water and a bottle of wine along with a few bottles of what you think is beer. You watch curiously as the waiter addresses Gunnloda more formally than you’ve seen before. “I wasn’t sure what you liked, I should have asked if you drank.”

 

“I do, I mean not really, sometimes? It’s, it’s fine, I enjoy a glass of wine every now and then.”

 

She lets out a sigh of relief and pours you a glass and you have to stop yourself from guzzling it to calm your nerves. “Have you ever been here before?”

 

You shake your head, kind of afraid to open your mouth in case you decide to start telling her your depressing childhood. “No, but everyone else seems to know of this place.”

 

She tilts her head and looks at you and it’s similar to the one earlier and you feel like you’re missing something. Which is a strange feeling, really, because you usually notice  _ too much. _

 

Whatever it is she’s looking for she seems to find because the next fifteen minutes are spent talking and she asks you about your work and you know you went on too long about it but she doesn’t seem to mind.

 

“Ma’am, the chef says the food is almost done.”

 

“Thank you, Vardalon,” She nods to him and he leaves. She gets up and gives your hand a squeeze, “I’ll be right back, darlin’.”

 

You nod and you have so many questions and you aren’t sure you want the answers because how do you ‘sort of’ work somewhere but check the food before it’s finished? 

 

Before you can continue your train of thought, she comes back, a couple of waiters following her with trays of food. _ A lot _ of food. 

 

Your eyes widen, you’ve never been one to have a big appetite. Your friends are always asking you if you’ve eaten, their parents always trying to feed you. 

 

She looks a bit embarrassed as she catches your gaze, “I didn’t know what you liked and I reckon I went a tad overboard.” 

 

They set several things in front of you as they try and find a place for everything, one of them just leaves the tray on a stand right next to your table. You’ve never seen such an assortment of food and the only time you usually see this much is during the holidays or one of Misha’s family parties. 

 

You see one of your favorite dishes and immediately reach for a piece of it as she sits down. You don’t even notice her watching you closely, nor the wait staff who are still around waiting for some kind of approval, as you just let it sit in your mouth for a moment, savoring it’s flavors, “Holy shit. How did you— holy shit.”

 

“D’you like it?” You can hear the worry in her voice.

 

You nod quickly and shove a larger portion into your mouth, “How—” you start but realize you should probably finish it first. You almost go for more when you remember that she asked you a question, “This is… this is my favorite dish from my… from my home. You—  _ this tastes so much better. _ ” When you finish you grab for more but this time you take smaller bites of it and make sure to save the rest of it for later. There’s so much more food you want to try now.

 

“I’m glad,” She has a huge grin on her face and you feel your heart flutter at the sight. “The woman that yelled at you t’get clean today told me about it. I’ve never made it before, so I’m glad you enjoy it so much.”

 

“You made it?” You say, this time not caring about your mouth full of food.

 

“Yes, that one especially, the rest I started but let my other chefs finish.”

 

“ _ Your _ chefs???” You have a forkful of food halfway to your mouth and it’s just hanging there as you stare at her in shock. The reactions of your family to the restaurant start filtering in and you realize that, for once, they noticed something that you didn’t. You start looking around, trying to find them, and while you do see Mielikki and Takara, the latter who is grinning at you with a raised eyebrow, you don’t see your friends and you turn back to Gunnloda, eyes wide. “I feel… really dumb right now because I think everyone else knows where we are and who you are and I… uh don’t.” You swallow thickly, or try to, the amount of food in your mouth takes you a couple seconds to get it down and then you start moving some of the food around with your fork, refusing to look up.

 

“If you don’t mind me sayin’, it’s rather refreshing that you don’t know.” You hear her chair scratch against the floor and within a few seconds she’s lifting your chin to meet your eyes, “I imagine you’re mighty intelligent, I reckon I was just too distractin’ for ya.” 

 

You snort and can’t help laughing in disbelief, “Goddess, you’re not wrong. You can flirt with me all you want  _ and _ have terrible lines and I will become a mess. You’re friend, Brimeia, on the other hand, I would like to punch in the face.”

 

She grins and leans in and your breath leaves you as her hand comes to rest on your cheek. You try to swallow again, but your mouth is suddenly bone dry, “I’ve known you all of an hour at most and your laugh is startin’ t’become one of my favorite sounds,” She takes a swipe at your bottom lip and you are just barely paying enough attention to stop your tongue from following the path.

 

“I could spend a lifetime with you and it wouldn’t be long enough.” You say as she’s sucking a piece of food off her thumb and she stops and stares at you. Your brain finally registers the words you’ve just said and you freeze. Everything seems to stop and go at a rapid pace all at the same time and you do what you do best, verbally panic. “Oh goddess, oh no. Why do I know words, why was I taught how to speak? Please forget I said that, I didn’t mean it. No, I mean, I did, but no I didn’t. That’s— that’s like we’ve been together for a while kind of thing not a I’ve literally only known you for an hour and I want to be with you for forever— not that we’re together— not yet. Did I mess that up? Of course I did I mean, I opened my mouth, it was bound to happen, right? Tha— that’s what this was right? Like a— like a date? I would like to go crawl into a hole, please do me a small favor and point me to one that would be great. Holy shit, I am really s—”

 

She took your hand in the middle of your panicked words, you watched it happen, you watched her take it, give it a squeeze and you saw the softest smile blossom on her face, she even stepped a little closer to you. None of it stopped your words, however. 

 

You see her step even closer, she moves you so that you’re whole body is facing her instead of the table, you know you’re still talking, but you honestly don’t know what you’re saying. Her lips are moving and it takes you several seconds to register her saying your name, “Seirixori, darlin’?”

 

“Y-yeah?” You finally manage.

 

“We’ll see how it goes, one thing at a time, darlin’. One thing at a time.”

 

You nod and it takes you a moment to get your breathing under control and for words to form, “I’m sorry I kind of… well… dove right into the deepest part of the ocean, really.” You start to say more but manage to stop yourself. You’re sure you’ll end up digging yourself even further into the ground if you continue talking. You’re glad she stopped you because you know had you gone on any longer you definitely would have started crying. Or at least on the verge of doing so… you still kind of are.

 

She smiles with a nod, “I know that feelin’ well and I’d like to enjoy taking you a little slower than that.” Her grin widens and you can feel your skin burn. Gunnloda might want to take it slow but it seems that she’s going to enjoy teasing the hell out of you.

 

You know you won’t have any complaints.

 

“Do you need to take a minute or two?” She asks softly and you’re grateful for it, the thoughtfulness. It’s a little embarrassing but compared to what’s happened so far, it’s mild.

 

You’re about to tell her no but you think better of it and nod. 

 

She tugs you out of your seat and gives your hands a squeeze, “Do you want me to grab anyone in particular?”

 

“R-Ryleigh, the— the blonde human… th— thank you.”

 

“I’ll be here when you get back.”

 

She leads you part way to the restroom and then heads to a different part of the restaurant that you hadn’t seen before.

 

Once you’re inside you wish you could just duck your head under the faucet of the sink, but your horns get in the way of that.

 

It doesn’t take long for Ryleigh to come barging into the restroom looking slightly panicked and a lot worried. 

 

As she gets closer you decide that the water you were going to splash onto your face should be splashed onto hers… and you heavily enjoy her screech of surprise and confused look.

 

“Hi,” you say to her once a few seconds pass.

 

“H— hi!? You had me scared to death! Your train girl came to get me and she wouldn’t tell me what was wrong!”

 

You smile sheepishly and this time do splash your own face with water, sighing into it, “I kind of… said something that was way too forward and incredibly um… fast-moving? Then I, well, you know…” You gesture nonsense with your hands. “Panicked.”

 

“ _ Homashoc,” _ she sighs and pulls you into a hug and you relax into it, not realizing how tense you really were.

 

You shrug and mumble into her shirt, “I told her a lifetime with her wouldn’t be long enough.” You cringe at her sigh.

 

“If this was your year anniversary or something I would praise you for one of the few times you’re really good with words…” Ryleigh hugs you tighter, “How did she take it?”

 

“I think… I think pretty well? Not in the ‘me too’ kind of way but the uh… ‘I understand you’re crazy and did not think that one through and I will ignore it for now’ kind of way. She— she stopped my word vomit after when I tried to...well, I  _ tried _ to make it better but you know me…”

 

“Just kept digging, huh?” She kisses your temple and pulls away to look at you. “I’m glad she’s taking it all in stride, you’re worth it and it seems she thinks so too. If not…” She frowns and you know she’ll threaten not only Gunnloda, but also her friends, even in a losing battle, just for you.

 

You let her hug you a little longer, “I like her a lot, Ryleigh,” you whisper and you know she can hear the vulnerability in your voice. “I’m not used to feeling this much, this fast, and I’m scared.”

 

“I’m not sure I’m the best person to give you advice on falling fast, but I do know what it’s like to feel a lot at once.” Ryleigh runs a soothing hand up your back, her fingertips gliding along each vertebrae in an attempt to calm you. “I’m not saying you shouldn’t be afraid to put yourself out there, but remember that fear lets you know when something is worth fighting for, because it tells you that you’re afraid to lose it.”

 

“Is that what finally got you to realize how you felt about Rukiya?” You snicker and she scoffs and rolls her eyes.   
  


“ _ Anyway _ , just go out there and be you. She sought you out, in spite of your clumsiness and falling asleep on her, remember that.”

 

“I don’t know if that makes it better or worse…”

 

“Seirixori,” Ryleigh grabs your face in her hands and it feels like she’s staring into your soul and it’s a little unnerving, but it does get you to focus. She starts taking deep breaths and letting them out slowly and you find yourself following suit. Your mind quiets down and you feel yourself relax, “Now go back to train girl and have a nice dinner, okay?”

 

You nod and Ryleigh gives you a parting hug and peck on the cheek and walks out of the bathroom and back to her table. You take the moment to take one more deep breath and let it out slowly, and nod to yourself before heading back to your dinner companion.

 

Urrak and Brimeia are standing around the table talking to Gunnloda. Brimeia spots you first and waves with a grin. Urrak gives you a glare and you aren’t sure what’s being said but Gunnloda shakes her head at Urrak and lightly pushes them away before you get back to the table.

 

“Is… is everything ok?” You ask as you sit down, nervous that her friends are trying to talk her out of… whatever this is going to be.

 

“Of course, darlin’. Urrak doesn’t always understand that sometimes things need a gentle touch and not an iron fist, so to speak.” She moves to sit next to you and she gently takes your hand, waiting until you look at her to continue, “Y’alright, darlin’? We can go somewhere quieter if it’ll help.”

 

“No, no. I’m... better, thank you… for that.” You look down as you start biting your bottom lip, feeling a little self-conscious. 

 

She reaches over and gently pulls your lip away from your teeth. You suck in a breath in surprise and she quickly pulls back her hand, “Sorry, was that too much?”

 

“Caught me by surprise, is all,” you manage it say while enjoying the blush on her cheeks. 

 

She nods and clears her throat, and it’s probably the first time you actually notice that she seems just as nervous as you do and oddly enough it relaxes you more. 

 

You spend the next hour or so chatting and watching her explain certain dishes and you’ve never seen such a small person put away so much food and drink, but you find yourself even eating more than your usual and by the time the two of you are done you feel like you can’t move.

 

“I think you’ve ruined me with food, I’ll never be able to eat a mediocre sandwich again.”

 

She laughs and takes you by the hand, helping you stand up, “Flatterer.” 

 

You bite your tongue, the word ‘only for you’ held back. You’re pretty sure they border on the verge of ‘too much, too fast’ and you don’t need to keep adding on to things you really shouldn’t say yet. Instead you just grin and shrug and let her lead you out the back.

 

“Where are we going?” You ask, surprised that you didn’t just enter an alleyway, but a rather large garden.

 

“I like to take a walk back here when I need some quiet time. The view helps.”

 

“Not another sight like it.” You say, looking right at her and you can feel yourself start to try and take it back, but her grin and the blush on her face stop you.

 

She squeezes your hand and leads you through a winding walkway surrounded by trees, flowers, vegetables, and other flora you can’t quite name. After a few minutes she stops in front of a locked gate that looks like it’s been taken over by the vegetation but cut just enough so the gate will open without issue. She lets go of your hand long enough to pull out a set of keys to unlock it and then takes your hand again and pushes her way through.

 

As you follow her and go through a series of turns, you can hear the sound of water. When she finally stops, you look and find yourself in front of an elaborate fountain billowing into a rather large pool of water.

 

“Oh wow, this is… this is amazing. I didn’t think there’d be anything like this in the middle of the city.” 

 

“It took a couple of years to get it looking decent, I’m pretty happy with it now.” Gunnloda sits on a bench you hadn’t noticed yet and happily watches you take in the surroundings.

 

“I could get lost in here for days and not even care.”

 

“Just let me know, so I know where to find you this time without feeling like a stalker.”

 

You try and smother your laughter with your hands but it makes you snort instead, which causes Gunnloda to laugh and it’s been such a ridiculous night that you just keep laughing, despite making even more of an idiot of yourself. 

 

When you finally get a hold of yourself you plop down next to her and she leans into your side as your tail settles itself around her waist and you rest your arm along the top of the bench, fingertips lightly tracing patterns on her shoulder.

 

You close your eyes enjoying the peace, something you were in desperate need for, really. Minutes pass before she breaks the silence, “You aren't fallin’ asleep on me again, are ya?” She teases.

 

You chuckle, “No, this is just really relaxing… thank you.”

 

She nods and settles in a bit closer, you aren’t really sure if it’s because there’s a light breeze, you’ve never been one to get cold easily, or if she just wants to be near. You’ll take it either way.

 

“May I ask you a question?” You ask, your brain running through the hundred you have.

 

She seems hesitant, but nods anyway, “Ask away, darlin’.”

 

“Your accent… it changes. Not that— not that it can’t. I was just curious. You— you don’t have to tell me why, sorry if it’s uh, personal or anything.” 

 

You know by the look she gives you that this particular question was the last one she was expecting and you’re a little glad for that. Yes, you’re dying to know about this restaurant of hers and why your family  _ knows _ something but won’t tell you, but… she was so relieved that you  _ didn’t _ know that you don’t mind keeping it that way for a little longer.

 

She tilts her head, like she’s working through what she wants to say. She lets out a laugh followed by a quiet sigh, “Full of surprises. When I was younger… well, I met someone who changed a lot in my life, some for the better. Some…,” She sighs again, but this time you can hear the sadness and you turn to face her, taking her hands in yours giving her whatever support you can. “I changed a lot of myself to fit what I thought she wanted. My accent was one of them. It took a really long time for me to build myself back up to who  _ I _ wanted to be and not be ashamed of who I  _ was _ before her, and after. That’s when I met Brimeia and Urrak. They didn’t care  _ who _ I was or what I believed, or any of that, they just wanted another workout buddy.” She laughs, “I’d gone just to vent some steam, took one of them out by the knees, and we’ve been friends ever since.” She shakes her head, “Sorry, you asked about the accent. It comes and goes, I’d changed it for so long that its difficult to completely rid myself of the old one, but,” she shrugs, “it has its uses durin’ business meetings.”

 

“I bet,” You grin, taking one of her hands and placing a kiss on her knuckles, enjoying the color on her face as you do. “Thank you for indulging my curiosity.”

 

“Any other questions?” She asks and you know what she’s fishing for.

 

“No, I think that’ll do for now. I mean, if I ask them all now, what will we talk about next time?”

 

“Next time?”

 

If she wasn’t grinning and giving you that teasing look you had seen earlier, you’d panic, “Yeah, maybe— uh maybe to the… zoo or uh, do you like animals?”

 

“The zoo sounds wonderful,” Gunnloda moves to her knees and leans up to place a kiss on your cheek, “Come along, darlin’, we don’t want your family to start wondering where we are.”

 

You follow along in a daze, completely taken with this woman and you really don’t think you’ll ever want it any other way.


	2. Chapter 2

It’s been several weeks since that first date. You and Gunnloda haven’t been on once since. The only saving grace is that you do talk to each other nearly every day, either over the phone or text. You’ve been rapidly getting busier taking abandoned and/or abused animals from homes, even so far as a small raid  _ you _ had to organize at an illegal zoo that held so many ‘exotic’ pets. 

 

In fact it’s something you’re currently still doing because you found a ledger of a dozen or more being sold and you’ve been spending the last week tracking them down.

 

Gunnloda sounded just as busy, something about new menus, new staff, possibly opening another restaurant. 

 

Just thinking about her makes you go searching for your phone. You curse yourself as a thorough pat down doesn’t produce it. You’re even more exhausted today than you were the night you met Gunnloda and the train is pulling up to the stop and you just don’t have the energy to walk back to work.

 

Plus it’s late, really fucking late, that you’re sure you won’t even catch the last train home if you do go back. Your body sags in defeat, and you make your way onto the train once it pulls in and the doors open. It’s pretty crowded but people move out of your way. You aren’t quite sure which dumb reason it is today, but probably a combination of your horns and your blood and maybe for the fact that you look like shit and are pretty sure you didn’t quite clean up all the actual blood and scratches you’d received from scared animals who should never have known what a cage was. You’re also certain the man who tried to run gave you a black eye.

 

Honestly, it doesn’t even matter because they even give you enough space to nearly pass out in a seat. Some of them actually look like they want to ask if you’re alright but you close your eyes and pass out almost immediately. Quick enough that you don’t hear someone calling your name softly and sitting next to you.

 

When you wake up you feel disoriented and while you gather your bearings you realize you’re being carried. And it’s strange, because you don’t panic, you know the last thing you remember is falling asleep on the train, so you should really still be on it. When you take a deep breath your entire body relaxes, and you hear a familiar chuckle, “Darlin’ while you’re rather light, try and not make yourself heavier. These stairs aren’t the easiest to navigate while carrying someone so tall.” 

 

“Sry,” you mutter and you know it isn’t really intelligible, but it also doesn’t matter. Gods you hadn’t realized how tired you were, trying to open your eyes is such a monstrous task that you give up less than ten seconds into trying. You say something, and you honestly don’t know what it is. By her laugh, Gunnloda doesn’t know what it was either.

 

“Try that again,  _ sor'odko _ .”

 

“Strong,” you pat her arm and try to angle your head so you can put your face against her neck, but she’s right you’re too tall and you can’t quite get your body to contort that way without making it more difficult for her. If you weren’t so tired, you’d be embarrassed by the whine that comes from the back of your throat.

 

“Almost there darlin’, then you can go back to sleep.”

 

“‘most where?” You manage, your eyes finally opening, but they’re crusty and the ugly yellow lights from the station have you closing them again. You groan lowly, you can feel a headache forming.

 

“Just a place for us to sit while we wait for your friends.”

 

“So confused. Happy, really happy, really confused. And hungry… but too tired.” Goddess you feel so weak, even lifting your head feels like you’re trying to lift fifty pounds.

 

You feel her come to a stop and try and… do something but she seems to be having trouble, “C’mon darlin’ help me out a little bit so we can get you back to lyin’ down.”

 

“Kay,” You murmur and you don’t really know what you’re doing, your eyes open just enough to make out her blurry image and she sets your feet on the ground. It takes longer than it should for you to get  _ some  _ of your balance, and really, she’s still holding you up. But at least you’re on your feet, right?

 

She maneuvers you onto the bench first and when she sits down next to you, you just slump right into her side. You smile at the warm laugh and you try to move, but it’s so godsdamn hard, “Sorry, s’hard to move.”

 

“That’s alright darlin’, I’ve got you.” She moves you so that you’re leaning against her even more and you adjust just slightly so that it’s more comfortable and she puts her arm around your waist as your tail does the same to her. “Get some more sleep,  _ sor'odko _ . Your friends will come pick you up soon.”

 

You make a small noise of protest, “But then you’ll leave. I missed seeing you, an’ now m’eyes don’ wan work so I can’t see you.”

 

“I’ll still be here tomorrow, promise.”

 

“R-really?”

 

“Mhmm,” She whispers and starts to hum a low tune and you try to fight it, you really do, but you just end up falling asleep again. You’re really going to hate yourself in the morning if this was all just a dream.

 

***

 

Everything hurts. 

 

_ Everything _ .

 

You know it’s morning, mostly from the light seeping through your windows. 

 

You know you need to eat, your stomach is making all the noise in the world. It’s a struggle but you finally manage to sit up. Something you instantly regret because your head swims and pain shoots right behind your eyes, “Fuuuuuuck,” you groan, not only in pain but your voice is hoarse and your throat definitely hurts.

 

You stumble your way into the kitchen, or try to. You make it to the doorway, slamming into it, and drawing the attention of everyone. “Morning…” you rasp, keeping hold of the doorway for now, not trusting your legs.

 

You’re so focussed on keeping yourself somewhat upright that you miss how all four of them— Ryleigh, Rukiya, Misha, and Gunnloda— start to move to you. You miss Misha and Rukiya stopping and Rukiya grabbing Ryleigh by the arm so that Gunnloda’s the only one to make it to you. 

 

“I’ve got you, darlin’,” she says to you as she steadies you and leads you to the table and onto a seat.

 

“You weren’t a dream. That’s good, that’s good,” you drape your arms over her shoulders and you’re pretty sure you’re hugging her and not at all using her to keep you upright. You barely hear the snickers from your friends, “Shhh,” you manage, “head hurts.”

 

Gunnloda brushes a few stray strands from your face as she whispers to you, “D’you want anything to eat,  _ sor'odko _ ?”

 

“Pancakes… and oranges. Orange pancakes. Is that a thing? Can it be a thing? It should be a thing. You stayed.” She turns you so that you’re facing the table and you place your head on the table as you lack the energy to hold it up.

 

“I did,” she places a kiss on your cheek and you’re so glad you’re sitting… not that you really have the energy to do anything but blush. You let out a little happy sigh that turns into a few coughs that have you groaning in pain at the end. “Noooo.”

 

You know your friends are talking but your ears are too clogged to hear any of it. A steaming mug of tea is set in front of you and you grin up at Rukiya, “Hi, Iya.”

 

“Hello, Ori.” Rukiya sits next to you and helps you sit up and lightly taps your hand as you try to reach for the tea. “We don’t need you to be sick  _ and _ burned.” She holds it up for you to drink and you take a couple sips, sighing at the relief it briefly brings your sore throat.

 

“You’re my favorite.” 

 

“I know,” she winks and helps you finish the tea before getting up to get you another cup.

 

“I don’t think I’m going to work today.” You groan, “I don't want to call  _ Oaauao _ .”

 

You hear Misha laugh, “Don’t worry your sick little head, Rii, we took care of it. In fact, your Ma said to take the rest of the week off. Takara protested, but you know your Ma’s in charge.”

 

“I change my mind, _you_ are my favorite.”

“And here I was, going to give you more tea,” Rukiya says as she sits next to you again, this time the teapot is beside her along with another steaming cup.

 

You pout and Rukiya just laughs as she helps you with your tea again. Misha comes into your eyeline as she sits across from you, dressed in her workout clothes and you squint because she never has them on in the— “Um… what time is it anyway?”

 

“It’s one in the afternoon,  _ homashoc _ ,” Ryleigh says quietly as she starts setting the table. She walks back to get the rest and places a soft kiss on your head as she passes by.

 

“...it’s what?”

 

“After noon, but before two.” Misha teases, downing some orange juice.

 

“How— how long was I out? ...I don’t even remember making it home to be honest.” 

 

“Roughly fourteen hours. If you don’t count you sleepin’ on the train,” Gunnloda says to you as she sets a small stack of pancakes in front of you and a larger, different looking, stack in the middle of the table. 

 

You squint at them because they’re kind of orange… and smell like orange juice and your eyes widen, “You— you made them?”

 

“Of course. Pancakes are pretty diverse food, darlin’.” She gives your hand a squeeze and goes back out of your field of view.

 

When you focus again, Ryleigh’s leaning over you and cutting some of the pancakes for you. You want to protest but when you have trouble picking up your fork, you say a quiet thank you as she sits on the other side of Rukiya, leaving the seat to your right open for Gunnloda. When you take a bite and the orange flavor, along with something else you can’t quite place, hits your tongue your eyes widen and you manage to turn to look at Gunnloda who is coming back with another stack of pancakes that she places in front of her seat.

 

“Let me guess,” Ryleigh says, pouring herself coffee, “She’s your favorite?”

 

You nod vigorously, “A thousand percent.”

 

Ryleigh pouts, “I see how it is.”

 

You grab another piece of the orange pancakes and hold out the fork to Ryleigh. Rukiya gently takes it out of your shaking hand and passes it to her girlfriend. 

 

Ryleigh stares at it and she gives you a deadpan stare, but you pout and it doesn’t take long for her to cave with a roll of her eyes and she takes a bite. She begrudgingly hands back your fork, “Yeah okay, that’s fair.”

 

Everyone starts talking about their week so far, it’s only Wednesday, and it hits you that they all stayed home today. You’re sick enough that your emotions kind of want to go off at any moment and you really don’t want to cry in front of Gunnloda right now so you focus on the food instead.

 

While the food is  _ fantastic _ and you were starving, you can’t seem to manage finishing the two pancakes in front of you. You do at least get to drink the tea on your own. Very briefly, however, because you start nodding off in the chair and Rukiya magically saves the cup, and you, from disaster.

 

“Go, we’ll put away everything.” You hear from Ryleigh and you feel more than hear Gunnloda shift next to you.

 

“Come along, darlin’, let’s get you back t’bed.”

 

“Okay,” you scrunch your face in confusion, you’d meant to protest, not wanting to spend more time in bed. Wanting, instead, to spend more time with Gunnloda since this is the first time you’ve seen her in a few weeks.

 

She helps you to your room and you really hope the heat you feel is just from her touch and not your actual temperature.

 

“Will you still be here?” You ask, already fighting sleep as she tucks you back under your covers.

 

“I will.” She hops up onto your bed and leans over to brush your hair out of your face again. 

 

“Hi,” you smile tiredly at her.

 

“Hi,” she whispers, stroking your cheek with her thumb.

 

You sigh, content and warm, “I’m sorry I don't feel well.” You open one of your eyes, “How did you even find me last night?”

 

“Nothin’ to be sorry for.” She crawls over you to sit next to you and she guides your head to rest in her lap and she starts running her fingers along your neck and the back of your head, relieving tension you didn’t even know you had. You can see a blush crawl up her face, “I was a little worried. I tried to call you a few times and you hadn’t answered, so I went to see if you were still at work.” She shrugs, “Takara was closing up and handed me your phone and said you had just left.”

 

“Mmm… yeah I realized I didn’t have it but I was too tired to go back. Rough day.” You manage, your words slurring together as you fight sleep.

 

“When you wake up again and are feeling better, you can tell me all about it, if you’d like.” She starts humming and it doesn’t take long for you to pass out again.

  
  


***

 

You wake up disoriented, not that it surprises you. You don’t know what time it is because you don’t actually know where your phone is. You take stock of how you’re feeling. Still groggy, the headache lingers but it’s nowhere near as bad, your throat feels better, and you aren’t nauseous anymore.

 

All things considered you feel heaps better than before you passed out again.

 

You sit up slowly and take a look around the room, Gunnloda is nowhere in sight but there’s a jacket draped across the chair in your room that you don’t recognize, and doesn’t look like it’d fit anyone in your house. 

 

You spot your phone on your desk, sitting atop your notebook and despite getting the rest of the week off you can’t stop worrying about the rest of the animals you haven’t been able to find a place for.

 

A place you trust.

 

Which, nowadays, is few and far between.

 

You thought the goats and the cats would be easy. You knew it would be hard to find a place for the ridiculous amount of reptiles. The bats… well the only bat sanctuary you know of is a few hundred miles away and you do not want them to travel that far. Foxes, lemurs, ferrets, and monkeys are illegal to own in Riverrun and Bellbury. Not that it stops you from having Stool, you’re at the edge of the border and no one tends to bother you out here. 

 

You open your notebook and start sorting the numbers you have, any of your contacts that could maybe have  _ other _ contacts that are trusted that could possibly take anything. Takara is probably going to come over tomorrow with half the load just because the Riverrun and Bellbury Animal Rescue can barely hold a quarter of what you found.

 

You hear your door open and you lean back in your chair and grin as you look over to see Gunnloda carrying a tray of food and looking a little baffled.

 

“Hi,” you say.

 

She shakes her head with a smile, “Hello, darlin’. How are ya feeling?”

 

“Better, thank you.” You lean over and place a kiss on her cheek as she sets the tray down on your desk. “What time is it?” It’s hesitant because you’re a little afraid of the answer.

 

“Just before eight in the evenin’. You weren’t out quite as long this time.” She jokes with a wink. She hops up onto your bed and looks at you expectantly. You immediately grab any kind of finger food on the tray and start eating it, feeling warmth spread through you at her pleased smile. “What were you workin’ on?”

 

“Trying to see if I know anyone that… knows anyone that wouldn’t mind  _ a lot _ of illegally owned ‘pets’.” You scoff at even using the phrase. “I don’t know why I’m checking again. I’ve already looked at least five times.” You groan and lean back, pushing away the notebook and focussing on the food instead.

 

“Can you send some of them to a zoo or back into the wild?”  

You shake your head, nearly devouring some sweet bread she made. “The zoo in Riverrun took what they could, but it wasn’t even a third of what we rescued.” You slouch in your chair as you lean back, “Part of the issue is I don’t trust a lot of people with these kind of animals so it’s hard to let them go. Then there’s places I know that would take them but they’re too far for a lot of the animals to travel. There just isn’t enough room at the Rescue to hold all of them.” You rub your face in frustration.

 

“Can they not be fostered?” She asks, and you’re grateful for the questions, really. In part because she actually seems interested, but also it’s nice to have another voice that’s outside of work help you through the situation.

 

“Maybe some of the reptiles, but most everything else… most everything else is either illegal or shouldn’t be a pet in the first place. Ugh, it might be easier to just do it myself.” You say off-handedly, picking at some red-meat thing that doesn't taste  _ bad _ but it’s never been your favorite.

 

“You don’t have to eat everything I make,  _ sor’odko _ .” She slides off the bed and walks over to you, you push your chair back so she can lean against you as she eats the meat instead and you do finally notice that there’s enough food for the both of you. “Is it possible? For you to do it yourself?”

 

You rest your chin on her head and wrap your arms around her waist and shrug, “I don’t really know. I have the space for it. I have  _ some _ money, and I have possible contacts that could help out with getting volunteers and medical stuff…” As you start listing things you know that’s needed from knowing other sanctuary’s, you realize that this is more than just a throw-away thought and something that has a pretty high possibility of being real. You turn Gunnloda around and give her a light peck on her lips. “You are a genius and I love y— it. I love it. Too much, okay,” You start grabbing for your laptop and notebook that has numbers in it,  “I need to—”

 

Gunnloda gently grabs your chin and makes you look at her. She doesn’t say anything and you’re perplexed as to why she’s just staring at you. Just as you’re about to ask she leans in and kisses you. 

 

Everything stops, your frantic search for what you need, your thoughts, time. Nothing seems to matter more in this second than her lips pressed against yours. She pulls away shortly after with a smile and you’re just staring.

 

“You’re supposed to be resting,  _ sor’odko _ . You’re taking me to the zoo tomorrow.” She says, cupping your face with her hands, placing another kiss on your lips.

 

“I am?” She grins and nods and you find yourself nodding with her, “Yes, right, uh, of course. What?”

 

She laughs and looks at your chair for a moment before shaking her head and pulling you up. She guides you to the bed where you follow her direction without question. You sit and dumbly help her as she climbs onto the bed and straddles your lap, “If you’re feeling better tomorrow, I believe you owe me that second date.”

 

You just nod, clearly distracted as your hands rest on her hips and you just end up staring some more, “You’re beautiful.” The red that blossoms on her cheeks only heightens your observation more. 

She responds with a kiss to your forehead, followed by one on the tip of your nose, then your mouth. You sigh into it, letting one hand settle on the small of her back and the other threads into her hair, undoing part of her braid. You’re not sure how long it lasts, just that when the two of you finally pull away, you find yourself breathless. “I could have a cold, you know.” Is the first thing out of your mouth.

 

She shakes her head with a grin, “Before owning my own restaurant, I dabbled a little in healthcare.”

 

“Really?”

 

She nods, “Another thing I did for the wrong reasons.” She pulls you into another languid kiss, “I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now, sick or not.”

 

“Could do it more often if I stop falling asleep on you,” you joke, and lean back, so that you’re lying down. You intended to scoot back so that you were fully on the bed but she leans down with you, cupping your cheek and kissing you again.

 

“I guess I’ll just have to kiss you every second you’re awake, then.”

 

“I can live with that.”

 

***

 

You spent nearly the entire day at the zoo. Something you hadn’t expected considering your friends can usually only handle a couple of hours. Some old, school friends even let the two of you feed the dolphins and spend some time with a few big cats. 

 

Gunnloda even let you tell her almost  _ everything  _ you knew about each one. Part of it you’re sure it’s because she was interested, the other part, however, you think is just because she doesn’t mind you talking.

 

Which is really fucking nice.

 

After lunch the two of you spent some time just wondering around, sometimes revisiting places to catch mini-shows or just to see your favorites. This time around talking about anything really. 

 

When you make it back to your place she offers to make dinner for you… and the rest of your family. You try to decline and even offer to cook yourself but both Ryleigh and Misha veto that before you get the whole sentence out. 

 

You don’t want her to leave and you say as much and she seems to hesitate but mentions that while she is the boss she can’t exactly be gone for three days without much warning.

 

She kisses the pout from your face and you borrow Ryleigh’s car to take her to the train station with a promise of calling you when she gets home.

  
  


***

 

“Here.” Takara hands you a leash and you follow it to the other end and come face to face with a black panther.

 

“Uh… what exactly am I supposed to do with them?”

 

“You’re taking her home. The zoo can’t handle anymore panthers—” she holds up her hand to stop you from interrupting, “-- yes I  _ know _ she’s  _ technically _ a leopard. We can’t keep her here, there isn’t enough room.” 

 

“Wh— but— I don’t—”

 

She slaps you lightly on your broken horn, “You have the space, you literally went to school for this kind of thing. I know you can take better care of her than the zoo can. You know it too.”

 

“It’s not  _ that _ . Are  _ you _ going to give me a ride home? I can’t take her on the train!”

 

“Sure you can. By the time anyone reports it, you’ll be home, and you obviously have an inside with the animal police. So you better keep that uniform on,” she winks and you roll your eyes and sigh.

 

“You guys don’t ever want to drive me home.” 

 

“Do you want to sit in rush hour traffic for over three hours to get out of the city, sweety?” Takara gives you a grin.

 

“No,” you pout and the panther starts to rub against your leg, almost knocking you over. You kneel down and she starts rubbing her head against your chest, “She’s so sweet,” you coo, and she lets you hug her, even using your broken horn to scratch her head against.

 

Takara snorts, “Just like your Ma. You two are the only ones get that kind of treatment from these wild ones.”

 

“They like you too,” your voice is muffled as she tries to get in your lap and rub her side against your face. You frown when you notice how light she is. “I think I need to see if Gunnloda knows any good butchers for some fresh meat.”

 

Takara pats you on the head, “See, already taking better care of her than anyone else. It’s past five, I’m tired of paying you overtime, get out of here kid.” 

 

You stick your tongue out at her and she laughs as the panther smacks you in the face with her huge paw. After a minute or two of wrestling with her to get off the ground, you finally manage to stand, “At least give me a ride  _ to _ the train station?” 

 

“I  _ suppose _ I can do that for you.”

 

“Thank you so much for doing such a difficult thing.” Takara shoves you lightly for the sarcasm, and it riles up the panther who just wants to continue playing and she jumps on your back, knocking you over, and knocks the wind out of you, “Is this what Stool would be like if they weren’t so tiny?” You manage to gasp out as Takara helps you up after a fit of laughter.

 

You try to act nonchalant while waiting for the train, everyone gives you an extremely wide berth and you’re glad you took Takara’s advice on keeping the uniform on. It seems to, so far, stop people from calling the actual police.

 

When the train shows up and you walk into one of the cars people immediately shuffle to the front end and away from you and the jungle cat. You kind of want to bring her with you all the time, it gives you so many seats to choose from. 

 

You sit down and the panther immediately jumps on the seat next to you, rubbing her head on your horns again. You try to get her off but you’re really not strong enough to move her. 

 

“Fancy meetin’ you here,  _ sor’odko. And _ in uniform.” You turn your head to say hello to Gunnloda but all you get is a face full of fur.

 

She laughs and the fur is gone, when your eyes focus it’s because the panther has turned its attention to Gunnloda instead.

 

She chuckles with you as the panther rests its head on hers and Gunnloda pets her between the shoulders. “I see y’got a new friend.”

 

“I was expecting to have to take on more, but I think this might be a fair trade.” You try and tug the panther so she gets off the seat so Gunnloda can sit down, however the panther just scrambles into your lap instead.

 

“I have a little competition for my favorite seat now.” The panther’s chest rumbles with a purr as Gunnloda continues to pet her, meanwhile you’re trying to catch your breath again.

 

“You’re more than welcome to it anytime.” You mutter trying to adjust so that you’re at least a little bit comfortable.

 

“Give her a name yet?” Gunnloda asks leaning up to kiss you as she takes your free hand in hers.

 

The panther licks your face before you respond and you groan, “Ravaphine.”

 

“That’s an interesting name.”

 

“An old friend from college. She was really affectionate… even more so when she was high.” You explain, smiling at the memory.

 

Gunnloda laughs again, “She sounds fun. Mind if I also follow you home?”

 

“I have a sneaking suspicion you’re only on this train _ because _ you want to follow me home.”

 

She gives you a wink, “Well, I might have had some plans for you tonight, if you were up to them, but I think Ravaphine here might need more attention.” The grin on her face has yours burning at the implication.

 

“This is all Takara’s fault,” you mutter. But you know she’s right, both of them are right. Ravaphine, the panther, is malnourished at the very least and she is going to need your presence most of, if not the whole, night to get adjusted to your place.

 

Instead of catching the bus or calling Ryleigh to come pick you up, you decide it’s a not a bad night to walk home from the train station.

 

After struggling with getting Ravaphine to walk  _ with _ you and not pull you, you take Gunnloda’s hand and swing it lightly as you all head to your home. “Still thinking about opening that second restaurant? Is it second, or do you have more?” You ask, now slightly comfortable with actually asking. 

 

“Just the one, I’m thinking of putting the second one on hold for now. Another… business opportunity has presented itself more recently that I think I’d like to put the money towards instead.”

 

“Oh? How did you come to own that place anyway? Did you start it?”

 

She shakes her head, “Not exactly. My family started it a while back. It shut down for a while. I don’t think it ran very well after I left.” She doesn’t say it, but you know from eating her cooking for at least three weeks now that it’s probably because the food just didn’t taste the same. “When I came back from Vecbony I opened it up again, after a time.”

 

You’re quiet for a minute or two, trying to form your question so that it makes sense. “So, Mielikki, Misha, and Rukiya seemed to know about your restaurant and uh, well I don't know, something else too but I didn’t ask them because… because I wanted to ask you. Can… can I? Is it okay that I ask you that now? I mean, I know you said you were glad I didn’t know who you were but—” you stop yourself and take a breath and let it out, “Sorry, I tried not to do that…”

 

She stops the two of you and Ravaphine tugs at your arm and you almost go flying off your feet but Gunnloda manages to grab the leash just in time and gently takes it from you, able to hold onto Rav much better than you. 

 

“Have I told you how adorable y’are?” She doesn’t wait for your answer but does tug you down so that she can reach your face and you were expecting a kiss, and she does give you one, but it’s much deeper than you were expecting and when she pulls back you’ve briefly forgotten where you are. She pulls you and Rav to a nearby tree along the road. Rav makes her way up the tree, happily playing in it for a few seconds before resting on a branch and making lazy swipes at your horns until you kneel to be more eye-level with Gunnloda. 

 

She takes a moment to herself, gathering her thoughts, “Normally I would suggest that your friends saw it in an article or the news but,” she tilts her head to study you, “...you know some very wealthy people. Or at least their family is wealthy.”

 

“I guess? It isn’t something I usually associate them with, though.” 

 

“Does the name Frostbeard sound familiar to you?”

 

“...No?” You squeak out, like maybe you  _ should _ know it, but you really really do not.

 

She lets out the breath she seemed to be holding, and you’ve never seen her so nervous before, “Dhog Lodir?”

 

“It’s uh… Southish, where a lot of dwarves live?” You clear your throat, “I admittedly know more about the animals there than uh, anything else.” You gasp, recalling one of your favorites and you start to ask about it but clear your throat before you get the words out and wait for her to continue.

 

She smiles wide, “You can ask when we get back on our way, darlin’,” She gives you a brief kiss, “The ruling family in Dhog Lodir is the Frostbeard’s—”

 

You interrupt, “You’re  _ fancy _ ?”  

 

She laughs, “I suppose you could call it that, yes. I left many years ago, to help with the restaurant, and then to… to follow someone.” She shakes her head, “During that time my family held many  _ fancy _ ,” she says it exactly like you had, “dinner parties for all the more wealthy and prominent families in Vyon. I don’t remember your friend Misha, I’m sure she was a lot younger, but your— Mielikki she’s hard to miss at something like that. She’s a very beautiful woman.” She blushes a little, “Rukiya— I do not remember her either, but if she got in that night we had dinner without a reservation, I’m guessing she is also someone that would have been invited.”

 

You nod, taking it all in, and after a minute you laugh a little, “I guess that would mean you might  _ know _ Misha’s parents. You uh, wouldn’t happen to be in contact with them anymore, would you?”

 

She doesn’t answer right away, looking at you curiously, “Perhaps I do, there are some from then that do still come around for dinner every now and then. The… less pompous of the group.”

 

You grimace, “My current girlfriend knows my ex-girlfriend’s parents and one of them still wants to murder me. Cool, cool, cool.”

 

“Maybe by name if y’told me, but no more than that, I was still practically a child,” she laughs and pulls you into a deep kiss, “gods, yer such a breath of fresh air.”

 

“Is— is that a good thing?” You ask breathless and a little weak in the knees.

 

“It’s a wond’rful thing,” she looks up at the tail hanging just above your heads, “there isn’t a chance your friends can watch her for the evenin’?” Gunnloda asks and the look she gives you is so intense that you have trouble swallowing.

 

“M— maybe?” Your voice cracks and after a brief moment you shake your head and slump a little, “No, not really. Cats don’t do well in new places. And I don’t uh, know how well they’re going to take to a panther...” 

 

She nods, grabs your shirt and kisses you again, this time nipping at your bottom lip and as you let out a small gasp her tongue flickers out and traces over where her teeth just were. When she pulls away you try to follow but she pushes you back with a low, throaty chuckle, “Just somethin’ t’look forward to later,  _ sor’odko. _ ” She nips at your lip again, pats the tree and grabs Ravaphine’s leash once she jumps down and heads a few feet away before turning and waiting for you to follow.

 

You let out a shaky breath and pull yourself up, using the tree as a crutch, “Holy shit,” you manage, breathless again and with only a small trip over your own tail, you eventually make your way to her, hand slipping into the one she holds out to you and your tail settles around her waist. 

 

“Y’got real excited there for a second when y’mentioned the animals of Dhog Lodir. Anythin’ in particular?”

 

It takes you a few seconds to even get your bearings and part of your excitement shifts back, and the two of you, mostly you, spend the next forty-five minutes talking about many of the underground beasts that roam Dhog Lodir.

 

***

 

Walking in with a panther went about as well as you expected. 

 

Which was not at all.

 

Rukiya nearly threw a knife at Ravaphine, Misha hid behind Ryleigh and brandished her spoon at it. Ryleigh just gave you one of  _ those  _ looks.

 

It also ended up being the perfect time to tell them about the plans you were forming. The only thing you were scared of was any one of them deciding to leave. 

 

Ryleigh knew immediately, of course.

 

“ _ Homashoc, _ ” she walks to you, giving side-eye to Ravaphine, but Gunnloda’s got her pretty distracted. “I’m sorry I’ve made you think I might leave,” you shake your head because she didn’t. It was just you, worried that she’d leave at any time if Rukiya asked her to. She takes your face in her hands, stroking your cheeks with her thumbs, “ _ I’m sorry _ , Seirixori. I know you’ll try to believe me and that it won’t always work, but I promise I won’t ever leave you, okay?” You bite your lip and nod, tears pooling and you look down. “Hey,” she waits until you look at her, “I promise.”

 

You just nod again and throw your arms around her, doing your best to bury your face in her neck without stabbing her in the face with your horns. 

 

“Sorry,” you whisper.

 

“Don’t  _ ever  _ apologize for your feelings, okay? I know Rukiya’s tried telling you that.” Ryleigh kisses your cheek and then pulls back, placing her hands on your shoulders, “So, what do we need to do?”

 

“Just like that? You don’t even know it’ll work, or that it’s actually a good idea, or the idea at all.”

 

“Of course it will work and of course it’s a good idea. You come home almost every night exhausted because you’re trying to find somewhere for these guys to go and there isn’t any.”

 

“I mean, there are but—”

 

“Are you trying to talk  _ yourself _ out of doing this?”

 

“... maybe.” You shrug and she moves with you to the couch, where Gunnloda is being smothered by Ravaphine. “No wonder you got taken, you’re just a big cuddle demon.” You instantly regret saying anything as Rav moves off Gunnloda and onto you. It takes you a few moments to get your breath back. “I don’t know, Ryleigh. It’s a lot of money and I already have a short list of people I would trust with trying to get more and maybe sponser or something.”

 

Gunnloda clears her throat to get your attention and she takes your hand when you finally manage to look at her after situating Rav. “I believe I mentioned earlier about another business opportunity I found that I would prefer to deal with than another restaurant.”

 

“Yeah?” You say, not quite understanding what she’s getting at.

 

She laughs, “ _ Sor’odko _ , I want to help you—”

 

“You— but— I can’t ask you to do that!” She gives your hand a squeeze and raises her brow at the interruption, “Sorry.” You mutter, waiting for her to finish.

 

“More than that, spendin’ these last few weeks with you, goin’ to the zoo, seeing what you do at work… There’s so much I  _ haven’t _ seen an’ I can already see how badly this is needed. Riverrun and Belbury don’t need another restaurant, they need somewhere for these wonderful creatures to go.” She gently gets Ravaphine off your lap and lightly tugs her so she’ll get off the couch. Once Rav rubs against your legs and lies down, Gunnloda turns to you and moves to her knees to make sure you’re both eye-level, “I would like to believe I would have done this if it weren’t for you,” Gunnloda’s lips quirk at the corner and she leans in to kiss you, only Ryleigh’s interrupting cough puts a stop to it. “—but I think it’s  _ because _ I’ve gotten to know you that I want to do this. Will you let me help you?”

 

You’re caught so off-guard that it takes you some time to process what’s happening. All the possibilities and all the things that could go wrong start flooding into your mind and instead of focussing on them you focus on her instead.

 

“I love you.”

 

You’ve wanted to say that since that first dinner. Just thinking about saying it after made you panic because you already started this relationship off with wanting to move to quickly, but right now, right now your heart is so full and you can’t think of anything else. 

 

You feel more than see Ryleigh try to sneak away from the couch, and you are still aware that Misha and Rukiya are in the kitchen and can see and hear everything, but none of that matters.

 

Before Gunnloda has a chance to say something, you continue, intent on making it clear it isn’t just because she’s going to help.

 

“I love you,” you repeat, “I— I don’t know if it’s okay to say that now, but I mean it. I’ve— you make me feel so much and just thinking of you makes me smile. Even when I wasn’t feeling well you stayed and took care of me. Even if that meant we had to wait to go out. I just—” you make a distressed sound at the back of your throat, “I— there’s so much more but I don’t know how to put it into words and the only thing I can think of that might even come close to it is, I love you. And if you don’t mind me repeating myself,” you laugh a little, “I could spend a lifetime with you and it wouldn’t be long enough.”

 

You finish and somehow you’re calm and no matter the outcome, you’re glad you said it.

 

Gunnloda blushes, her eyes darken, and you’re sure she’s moved closer. She moves even closer as she straddles your lap and pulls your face into her hands and barely an inch exists between the two of you, “I promised myself I wouldn’t rush into another relationship. I didn’t want to do that again, I didn’t think my heart could take it.” She rubs her nose against yours, your lips just barely touching, and her words have quieted to a low whisper, “I find myself not caring. I see you and I instantly feel lighter, everything feels brighter. So even if the part of me that’s afraid I’ll— afraid I’m being selfish, I don’t care. I’m sure I could go through life without you, but I don’t want to. Of all the choices I never made or were made for me, _I’m_ making this one. I love you and I choose _you_.” 

 

She presses her lips to yours and it’s soft and slow. It cements the words and feelings the two of you just poured out. You lose track of time and the only thing that pulls you out of the fog you’re in is the sniffling coming from the kitchen.

 

“Misha, stop crying.” You hear Rukiya try to whisper.

 

“Shut up,  _ you  _ stop crying!”

 

“Can we please all stop crying and confessing? I’m hungry.” You hear Ryleigh try and sound unaffected, but you know better, you chuckle into Gunnloda’s lips before slowly pulling away.

 

“I love you,” you whisper one more time.

 

“I love you, too,  _ sor’odko _ .”

 


End file.
